Friday, July 14, 2006

I found my muse...

So on Wednesday, I said I could only come up with 3 reasons that I was glad I was single... well, I have given that some thought, and I have come up with 27 more. The list on Wednesday was of a more serious nature... and I considered deleting it. But it is what it is, so I will leave it. But in the interest of balancing the serious with the humorous... I present to you the Top Thirty Reason I am Glad I am Single:

1. I never have to share the covers
2. I don’t HAVE to put the toilet seat down (even though I ALWAYS do)
3. The floor works very well as a dresser/closet
4. I don’t have to change my sheets every week
5. I can use the same towel for weeks at a time
6. An HEB pre-made rotisserie chicken will sustain me for almost a week’s worth of lunches
7. When eating at a restaurant, I don’t have to share my meal with anyone
8. I only have to buy one ticket instead of two
9. When I have had a bad day, I don’t have to talk to anyone about it if I don’t want to
10. Holidays are simple… no extra family groups to fit into the schedule
11. I don’t have to share the remote control when watching TV
12. I don’t have to go see “Princess Diaries” or the like…
13. I never have to ask permission to hang out with the guys
14. I can hang out with females whenever I want to
15. I don’t have to shave every day
16. I never have to answer the difficult questions like “Does this dress make my butt look big?”
17. I can not notice a girl’s new hair cut and it is not really a big deal
18. If I am late for anything, I have only myself to blame
19. More discretionary income
20. I can snooze for two hours in the morning… or longer
21. I can choose to not attend weddings and people chalk it up to “he’s a guy”
22. I don’t have to redefine what “a clean bathroom” means
23. I can snore with complete immunity (not that I do… but the point is that I CAN)
24. I can talk in my sleep (again, not that I do… of course, I wouldn’t know one way or the other I guess)
25. I can change my stated plans at the drop of a hat
26. I never, EVER have to purchase feminine products
27. All four weeks of every month are pretty much the same for me
28. I get invited to all the “fun single events”
29. When visiting out of town friends, I can sleep on the floor or the couch in the living room instead of having to get a hotel room
30. I can post a list like this and not have to hear about it later

18 comments:

Amanda said...

I enjoyed visiting your blog...I especially enjoyed your 27 reason why you enjoy being single...I understand EXACTLY what you are saying...it's funny though this was the topic of a conversation I had with friends yesterday.

Great blog!

Shanna said...

31. I can have best girlfriends without my wife getting jealous. That's sexy.

Todd Richards said...

Shanna... that is a good one, but I am not yet 31. If I am still single when I turn 31 (which is entirely likely) I will add it to the list.

Laurie said...

I love this list. My favorite one is #27.

Shandra said...

Todd, I'm a little worried about #5...please try not to use it for weeks!!! ewww

Troy said...

Amen, brother! This list is dead on.

Eye Doctor Justin said...

Confession:

I have always wanted to purchase feminine products. I think it would be exilirating! That whole aisle in Walgreens is like being on foreign soil... I feel like I have to ask permission to enter.

Anonymous said...

about #4 but if you were married...perhaps you could be blessed enough to NEED to change those sheets every day buddy!

Megan said...

are you supposed to change the sheets every week? :)

Megan said...

oh yea...and at our house a towel lasts at least a week.

Todd Richards said...

Justin, not sure what to make of that... but to each his own. This is one way in which you and I are not so similar. :-)

Shandra, it really is weekS... but not months. Is that better?

Anonymous, seriously? Let's try not to take the list seriously, OK?

Megan, thanks for backing me up...

Shandra said...

no Todd, it's not any better. matt was the same way in college. they get stinky!! just go a week and i'll feel a little better.

Anonymous said...

I like men. A little germy, but fun.

Anonymous said...

Anonymous...I agree.

Anonymous said...

I hope putting all these reasons why it's good to be single makes you feel okay about being alone... A love of a good woman out weighs any of your top 30 list.

brian said...

Todd, I was alone last night and cracking up at your top 30 list.

Ryan said...

Todd, the question "does this dress make my butt look big?" is not a difficult one to field. Anyone who has a bias toward things like keeping teeth in his mouth and ever having sex with his wife again knows there is only one answer to that question and frankly it only takes a few minutes to train yourself to spew it out automatically.

Carrie White Owen said...

Todd--interesting blog. Funny! Can't wait until you meet that certain someone that makes you totally forget this list. Then you can make a list of 10000000 reasons why you are glad you are not single. Until then...enjoy it! But just wait...the best is yet to come! :)